Stewarding Pain
Stewarding Pain
One of my favorite seasons is Advent. The expectant waiting we acknowledge in the church calendar during Advent is reflective of the reality we live in daily. We make time to recognize that all our hopes and fears are met and will be met in Jesus. When my fears and doubts come face to face with my Hope, I am often overwhelmed by the reality that Jesus came to make blessing flow as far as the curse is found.
The curse of sin implies pain, and we must steward that pain while also helping our TCKs to do the same. Waiting often feels like part of the pain when solutions and resolutions do not come quickly. This side of Heaven, the effects of the curse are always present in our lives, but understanding that it has purpose allows us and our children to wait well. In theological terms, we call this the already and not yet; in therapeutic discussions, we talk about the importance of being able to acknowledge that two feelings can exist in any one situation; in TeachBeyond’s TCK orientation program, we talk about a pair of ducks (i.e. paradox). No matter what words we use, facing the reality of sin’s curse can only be engaged well when Jesus thoroughly fills our view. That can only be done when we wake up daily with a rigorous determination to put our feet on the floor, declaring to our own hearts and the hearts of the TCKs under our care that God is faithful, sovereign, and good.
The story God writes in our lives and the lives of our TCKs is full of challenge and pain. Life does not always look like we planned, and our kids feel the same way. When we leave a place we’ve called home, when friends move away, when countries we love implode, when holiday seasons remind us of what we love and what we have lost, it is a call to rigorous stewardship of pain, remembering that, when we stop expecting to see God’s goodness in the land of the living, we descend into bitterness (The Daily Grace Podcast, 302). God works in and through pain, so how can you and how can you help the TCKs around you engage the story they’ve been given? How can you and how can you help the TCKs around you see that we’ve been entrusted to steward the pain of following His call so that they can be a part of bringing His reign and rule as far as the curse is found? What would it look like to not waste the wounds of ministry or turn to bitterness but, rather, believe that God can redeem the pain? What would it look like to model that God has entrusted you and them with something hard, and, when we let it play out, there is blessing and redemption in and after the waiting?
The TCK Team is available to talk through these questions with you privately ([email protected]) or on Teams (TCK Parenting | General | Microsoft Teams).